Sarcastic Facebook Status

There has never been, there never was, and there would never be anything phenomenal, all consuming and alluring than Facebook. It is the 2nd most popular website after Google. Status messages on facebook have become a trend these days. If we scan through the list of such updates, we will frequently find them expressing all types of emotions-happiness, sadness, jubilant, guilt, humor, elation, depression and what not. The paragraphs below enlist some sarcastic Facebook status messages.

Sarcastic and Hilarious Status Messages

Statuses have become so popular in the recent years, that leaving them blank gives a feeling of void in the heart! You know, something-is-missing-from-life sort of stuff. There is some sort of gratification in coming up with some unique status messages that possibly no psychology or emotion can explain!

▶ ____ thinks the nice thing about waiting a week to listen to your voicemail is that those people usually don't need you for that thing anymore.

▶ The grass may be greener on the other side, but at least you don't have to mow it.

▶ I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here.

▶____ thinks that if you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

▶ Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy ANYTHING.

▶____ is out making some changes in his/her life...leave a message and I'll get back to you. if I don't return your message you're one of the changes.

▶ The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.

▶ It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.

▶ There are plenty more fish in the sea, but who wants to go out with a fish?

▶ Not all of us have the time to fulfill our life's ambition of being completely ridiculous.

▶____ hopes that my passive aggressive silence has been noted.

▶ Hello, this is the computer. Here I am ... brain the size of a planet, and what does my owner have me doing? ... taking messages on AIM.

▶____ is sure that everyone has a right to their own opinion, but I think you'll find that mine is the only one that counts.

▶ I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

▶ The basis of action is lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream.

▶ 36 years old is significant, because at 36 you can sleep with someone half your age and not go to jail.

▶ It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue.

▶ I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like?

▶ All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening.

▶ Due to recent cutbacks and until further notice, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

▶ Don't worry about what people think. They don't do it very often.

▶ I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

▶ Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

▶ A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.

▶ Depression n. - Anger without enthusiasm.

▶ Programmer n. - An ingenious device that turns caffeine into code.

▶ Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive anyway.

▶ I've given up the search for reality; now I'm just looking for a good fantasy.

▶ Get your mind out of the gutter - it's blocking my view.

▶ Every One Has The Right To Be Stupid But You're Abusing the Privilege

▶ In man's struggle against the world, bet on the world.

▶ If you're one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.

▶ Lord, defend me from my friends; I can account for my enemies.

▶ Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have

▶ Sleep is actually a good substitute for coffee.

▶ I can't be fired, slaves are sold.

▶ The glass is neither half empty nor half full. It is twice as large as it needs to be.

▶ People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.

▶ The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list!